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pink-vulva:

once i take my bra off, don’t ask me to do shit for u bitch bc once that bra comes off, i am clocked out of life. i am done. i am finished. i am logged the fuck out. 

(Source: pinkvelourtracksuit)

moonager:

One time I was on a rollercoaster and a guy’s hat fell off during one of the loops but he caught it when we were right side up again, and i have to go my whole life knowing I’ll never be as cool as that guy.

(Source: deersjaw)

(Source: r2--d2)

(Source: expensivelife)

(Source: thecrazythewzrd)

larrycoincidences:

whenever i get low on money i start thinking really irrationally like what if i hadn’t spent that $10 back in 2004 

evolutionofmine:


"Yes hello, I’d like to make a de-paws-it."
"That’s funny."
"My finances are not a fucking game, Jessica."

hahaha

evolutionofmine:

"Yes hello, I’d like to make a de-paws-it."

"That’s funny."

"My finances are not a fucking game, Jessica."

hahaha

(Source: theclearlydope)

accordingtoaustin:

seanydg12

(Source: alisxrico)

(Source: msawake)

(Source: awwww-cute)

(Source: tastefullyoffensive)

(Source: fonesecks)

(Source: gallivantly)

ameliacarina:

how do you say ‘please talk to me more i crave your company’ to someone without sounding like a creep